Caught between a Komodo Dragon and a hard place

You see, what had happened was...

On this ominous stratonimbus studded day, we traversed through MacRitchie Reservoir to check out the tree top walk. Little did I know I was about to be bullied for the first time in my life (barring the jumping bikes over my head and other bullying from Mike and Ben Comer in the late and great 90s)

So it all started by almost stepping on this little (highly venomous) guy, the Malaysian Coral Snake. Aint no thing-just some wildlife, recovered. 

After about 12k of hiking and a little rainstorm, I was led into a well executed trap by some clever Ray Ban predators. 

First accomplice, this swimming komodo dragon/monitor lizard. He did not play an active role but he secured restriction to exit by water.

Now, public enemy #1. We were just walking on our merry way and this guy jumped down out of the trees directly in front of us, separating our group. We were instructed by probably 10 signs not to make "direct eye contact" (he must be related to the basilisk from Harry Potter and Medusa). So this picture was taken at extreme risk.  

We were also warned that the monkeys here felt like any cameras, bags, bottles, SUNGLASSES, etc. were subject to their taking...and so it was. So once he came and stole Dona's water bottle out of her hand, two more of his cronies surrounded us. To recap, brazenly bold bottle snatcher monkey at our immediate 12 o'clock, side kick #1 at our 9 o'clock, komodo dragon at our 3 o'clock and one other monkey taking a lap, and all closing in. We were surrounded. 

So what were we to do? RUN! I Usain Bolt-ed out of there as fast as Comer-ly possible. Once I had reached a safe distance, I finally looked back only to realize my Ran Bans had been jacked. Do I dare step back into dragon and monkey territory?...and now in the rain. The outcome:

My Valentine from one of my coworkers 

Well, at least they are being put to good use. You're welcome you scoundrel. I got swindled.   

I'm Singing: "Survivor" -Destiny's Child

Gong Xi Fa Cai! (Happy Chinese New Year!)

How could I have lived my last 24 years without celebrating CNY? There is something really magical about everyone's gladittude approaching the Lunar New Year...I woke up on Chinese New Year's Eve and skipped down the street (literally) and hugged the first person who told me "Gong Xi Fa Cai!" 

Out with the year of the Dragon (my year) and in with the year of the Snake. When it's your year, it is supposed to be the hardest on you as much is expected from you so hel-lo year of the snake! 

Here's a little peak into some of the festivities-

The Lion dancers at the temple next door:

Different lion dancing groups came throughout the day and played drums coming down the street (starting at 8am...) so I had my shoes ready and when I heard them drop the beat, I would run over!

Welcoming the New Year in Chinatown with firecrackers/fireworks:

The static-y noise you hear are millions of firecrackers (imagine mega-sized Black Cats from Wacky Waynes) lit on the ground

Pictures of CNY in Singapore (click here) 

Here's a guide for how to "fit in" at your next Chinese New Year (haha who are we kidding, "fitting in" might be a reach, at least for me): 

1. Red envelopes ("angbaus"): Basically when all your married friends give you money (in a red envelope) for being single. wooooo wooooo! Fist bump, high five, cue the Taylor Swift song. Red envelopes are given the first time you see the intended recipient after it has turned the New Year. There are some rules to keep in mind: The amount of money inside should always be an even number, and should never include a "4" in the digits of the amount (because the pronunciation of "4" resembles death...)

 1b. So, as a counter offer, you need some Mandarin Oranges: This is the return gift for someone giving you an angbau. They also must be given in even numbers (again, never giving 4 or anything with 4 in the amount). Also, don't try to get fancy and spring for a pear-that will be extra insulting as that would mean you wishing separation for that person and his/her loved ones. Irre-PEAR-able faux pas. 

2. No sweeping, no problem: You don't have to tell me twice...It is traditional to do Spring cleaning on the days leading up to the Chinese New Year b/c after it reaches midnight on the beginning of the New Year, you should not sweep your house for at least the next 2 days. Otherwise, you will be sweeping all the blessings and good luck out. If you're feeling a bit resentful to someone, you could take a very crumbly dish when visiting family and friends because it would be bad luck for them to sweep after.

3. Lo Hei: A Singaporean tradition of tossing a salad symbolizing all prosperous things for the new year, because Who doesn't like a good group toss?

The higher you toss the salad, the more prosperous you will be for the next year.

So HAPPY NEW YEAR, welcome the year of the water snake. So far, I've had some very lucky and unlucky occurrences (e.g. I found $10 in my jeans pocket but also there is a monkey in MacRitchie now wearing my Raybans so the verdict is still out on what kind of year the snake has brought)

But one thing I do know, the promise of a new year brings the hope for something great! Gong Xi Fa Cai!

I'm SINGing: "This is the New Year" -Glee cast

The Return of the Crow Culler...

And so the crow culling saga continues. 

After waking up to 4 gun shots (and you know, almost having a heart attack), I realized it was just the servanthood of our dear, devoted neighborhood crow culler right outside my window. Shew. I have yet to see one crow (except for the dead one falling from the tree I was walking under in crow culler meeting 1) but I have in fact seen more crow cullers than anyone else I know in Singapore. I guess that means they are good at their jobs and that I'm a natural culler magnet? Well keep on fighting the good fight, but maybe next time, let's aim for post 9am cullings.