Haze Days

Despite THE HAZE, the show must go on. 

(This is what Singapore normally looks like)

I took this picture less than a week ago

Me when the haze is finally over:

The only cure for this Purple Haze is a little Purple Rain. 

Eat. Pray. Bali.

Going to Bali reminded me of my love for Eat, Pray, Love. Call me cliche...I deserve it. So it is there I'll begin:

In the end, I've come to believe in something I call "The Physics of the Quest." A force in nature governed by laws as real as the laws of gravity. The rule of Quest Physics goes something like this: If you're brave enough to leave behind everything familiar and comforting, which can be anything from your house to bitter, old resentments, and set out on a truth-seeking journey, either externally or internally, and if you are truly willing to regard everything that happens to you on that journey as a clue and if you accept everyone you meet along the way as a teacher and if you are prepared, most of all, to face and forgive some very difficult realities about yourself, then the truth will not be withheld from you.

Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love. 

Physics was never really my subject. And by that I mean, I hated physics, and I was terrible at it. BUT I did retain Newton's first law-the law of inertia (obviously the most important...): The tendency of an object to resist changes in motion/velocity and to maintain its current state of motion.

"The vis insita, or innate force of matter, is a power of resisting by which every body... endeavours to preserve its present state, whether it be of rest or of moving uniformly forward in a straight line."

...A human tendency that keeps me from uncovering other truths because my nature is to follow the same trajectory, to be housed in old resentments and the gravitational pull towards what's comfortable to "endeavour to preserve my present state" even if it's not ideal/healthy/productive- Because we all know what change means...the existential questioning, push the red button crisis. But I've come to realize that it's impossible to live unaffected by the people you meet along the way, and thank goodness-it is only through that reflection of ourselves that we can even begin to face and forgive some realities about ourselves, learn funnier jokes, discover new recipes, learn Gangnam style, see things differently or marvel at something in spite of our baggage. 

 I learned one of those truths through a friend we met along the way in Bali, Adi. Adi was our driver and host at Dara Ayu, a villa we stayed in. He was so kind and in the short time we stayed there, he taught me so much. He lived in a house just beyond the rice fields and he walked in to work. Dona and I had decided to wake up for the sunrise (gasp, I know what you're thinking, "YOU, up BEFORE the sun?" Well believe it, friend. Talk about transformation...) and have some time out in the rice terraces before it got too hot. When Adi came up, he took us on a trek down through the rice fields and taught us about the process of harvesting rice.

Did you know that EVERY SINGLE little rice stalk is planted BY HAND. EVERY stalk. Can you imagine? He also showed us a fresh water spring where he and several of the rice harvesters have created a temple to honor the gift of this spring. They take nothing for granted and are driven by their faith to give praise for gifts of natural water and for places where big trees grow. Things like this bring me toe to toe with the things I take for granted and the people's truths I might have otherwise overlooked. But physics tell us that those forces are the ones that help us change our linear path and move towards a path appreciating the truths of others and to live affected by the realities of them.

While staying at Dara Ayu, we visited the volcano located in the center of Bali. Adi told us about the destruction there and the resilience of the people in Bali over this incredible view during lunch.

Then I looked around in this place at the chaos its endured. The way its been adapted, burned, pillaged, and found a way to build itself back up again...and I was reassured. Maybe my life hasn't been so chaotic, It's just the world that is. And the only real trap is getting attached to any of it. Ruin is a gift. Ruin is the road to transformation.... we must always be prepared for endless waves of transformation. 

-Elizabeth Gilbert

I was so inspired by Bali's strength and beauty despite tragedy and wreckage from past events. Ruin is a road to transformation.

Tanah Lot  was one of my favorite temples and you can only get to it during certain tides so we were lucky enough to get to explore it a bit (This is also the scene of  my first and probably last bit of mistaken fame with my paparazzi moment).

I was also incredibly lucky to have such WONDERFUL travel companions and some new friends! Dona, Deo, Mhalu are in my community group through Every Nation Church and Liane and Jill are friends from the Philippines. We had such an adventure together with our pisang goreng, midnight Balinese massages, and even the car rides were entertaining :) Especially with our sweet corn and karaoke! So so thankful for such a lovely group of friends to trek Bali together! 

Want to see some more? Snapshots of Bali

I'm SINGing: "Heart of Gold" Neil Young

Fake it til you Make it

So I've been dragging my feet on posting about Bali because there's just so much beauty to write about. So instead of posting about how it truly awakened and fed my soul (just yet), I am going to first tell you about what I think must have been some David Blaine mind trick that may have caused my Indonesian 15 minutes of fame...but hey, I'll take it. While visiting Tanah Lot, my friends and I started taking some group pics in front of the temple (as per usual), and I noticed some onlookers using the strategy of getting your friend to pose and then the friend sort of ducks out of the way so you can really take a pic of something behind your friend but not look sketchy...little did they know I too have mastered this art capturing the glorious mullets of the South, USA. Busted. Anyways, so a few people came over to me and asked what I thought was, "Will you take a picture of us" so I said "sure" and then about 10 people came putting arms around me and throwing up token peace signs smiling for our paparazzi picture. After that first picture, there began a queue of people waiting to take a picture with me-mob mentality is real-for the next 20 minutes. It probably didn't help that my sweet friends were egging it on with comments about filming the sequel to Eat.Pray.Love. and how was I doing "Mrs. Roberts." I should have asked them who they thought I was or why they even wanted a picture together but I was too star struck by my new found fame so I just soaked it in because if my dream of becoming Joan's long lost sister on Mad Men falls through, this may have been my only shot at celebrity status.

But really, I could see where they might get confused. After many many years of practice (Morgan Smith circa kindergraden and on) I did do a pretty good Ariel hair flip:

I'm SINGing: "Fame" -David Bowie

The SMRT Gospel

I spend a good chunk of time on public transit in Sing. That is the understatement of the year- I spend A LOT of time on public transit. I've tried so many different tactics to make being crammed between people in what I think is consistently the strangest smelling combination of things (at least no Durian smell, of course) just a little more enjoyable. But the other day, when I left my book at home and my phone was flat, I thought a lot about the route I take everyday on the SMRT (Singapore Mass Rapid Transit) and how its story is so similar to my experience with faith and my relationship with the gospel of Jesus.

First, my mentality so much of the time with the MRT is to "fight the good fight"...for a seat. I mean, sitting during my commute is of utmost importance for the outlook of my day and I WILL do whatever it takes (elbows out, mean mugging, etc). Me, me, me, I want a seat. In Singapore, it is expected that you give up your seat for pregnant women (#peoplegetcreative), older people, and kids but when I had my arms full of groceries and someone got up and gave me his seat, I realized it's not necessarily all about "fighting the fight" but learning to LOVE like Jesus-to put someone's needs before your wants. "Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." (Plato)

Then, I thought about this: you know how you can get in the mindset of being unhappy about whatever that "big bad thing" (BBT) is in life at that season and you are convinced it will always be that way, because you can't imagine life without the constant nagging of that BBT (maybe your financial situation, your relationship status, your kids' baddittudes, my constant frizzy hair in Sing or my long commute...insert nagging BBT here). And how often I let the BBT put me in a funk. But aren't we always taken aback when inevitably something unpredicted does happen to change our relationship our BBT (like looking to my left one morning to a man in his 80s shaving his beard on SMRT next to me). haha No, maybe a better example: One morning I sleepily pushed my way onto the subway #morningsarenotmyfav and 2 stops later, the guy beside me had an impromptu Gangnam Style singalong/performance that everyone got into. Ordinary thing (commute) turned extraordinary...and totally unpredicted when I started my everyday common commute. So then I thought, why don't I expect interesting changes in life from an interesting Jesus? Like Robert C. Gallagher put it, "Change is inevitable – except from a vending machine" and of all the interesting things I have observed/been party to on the SMRT, even on the SAME seemingly "predictable" commute, there is a brilliant joy in the unexpected changes we spend so much time convincing ourselves will never happen. 

Being PRESENT. I have overslept my stop, gone in the wrong direction on the train line, and gotten off at the wrong stop so many times (shamefully unashamed). When I'm not present or paying attention, I miss what was intended for me and it takes a lot of work to get back to where I was going. I used to get upset when I'd mess up the route, I'd run up above ground and quickly flag a taxi, mostly because of stubbornness and just pure surrender, TKO. However, I think about how now, I correct myself, get back on track and make it there-sometimes the consequence is loss of time or loss of a seat (and we know how devastating that is for me), but the point is, I'm still able to get there. When I miss my chance on occasions in life or make mistakes of decisions, God's grace isn't always like the taxi that will easily chauffeur us to our destination but his grace is also sufficient for us to get back to the destination intended for us or to show us a new bus line or different train to make it there a different way from where we are. When we make mistakes, it doesn't ruin our chances of making it to the joy God planned for us in the first place-it just may look a little different, you might be a little more weathered, and the alternate route can be a little rough going. But I've seen A LOT of the city through being lost and have made discoveries I would have never seen otherwise. Same same in life.

So today might be extraordinary, but even if it's not, let us be motivated by love, expectant in adventure, and present in His grace. 


I'm SINGing: "Beautiful Things" -Gungor AND "Something Beautiful" -Needtobreathe

Me in a hurry to get anywhere in Sing:

Sing Population: 5.31 million
Size of Singapore: 274.13 square miles
Population density: 18,943/sq mi

Compare:
Size of Augusta, GA: 306.49 square miles
Population density: 816/sq mi 


Thanks Frogger for preparing me in 1996 for what I would need to know for 2013. The legacy lives on. 

I'm SINGing: "Bright Lights" -Gary Clark Jr.

Escalator warnings. Noted.

 You know back when your parents told you if you cross your eyes, your face would get stuck that way but you secretly knew it would never happen? Well, don't make that mistake with escalator safety. It is not in fact like that...

After the escalator was stopped and before a band of security
guards came to cut my skirt out of the escalator
with craft scissors.

The escalator at the National Library of Singapore: 1

My skirt: -4 inches off the bottom 

But you can see why it could get confusing:

So, lesson learned. 

Aikid-you not.

My vision for my first day of Aikido: 

Reality: 

Martial Arts is no walk in the park. After trying several different traditions, I have officially become a deshi (student) of Aikido. I was so moved by what it stood for, the Sensei (teacher) at my Bishan Community Centre dojo (training centre), and the hearts of the Aikidokas (practitioners of Aikido) and so here we go. 

Let's talk Aikido (Eye-key-doe)

Ai = harmony, Ki = spirit, Do = The Way or Path
(For more vocab)

Aikido (合気道) is a Japanese martial art developed by Morihei Ueshiba and is often translated as "the Way of unifying (with) life energy” or as "the Way of harmonious spirit." Ueshiba's goal was to create an art that practitioners could use to defend themselves while also protecting their attacker from injury. Aikido focuses on using the attackers' negative force against him/her--to not push back but to pull when an attacker pushes, to use the attacker's momentum to disarm.

Sensei Kelly Tan with Steven Seagal

To the right is my Sensei (Kelly Tan) doing a demo in Singapore

My teacher, Sensei Kelly Tan always stresses taking care of each other during practice and creates an atmosphere where the Yundanshas (Black belt holders) guide the kohais (junior students...me). They are so patient with me, the only ang mo in the class. The only trouble is it's a bit hard to blend in when I'm not exactly sure what I'm doing. My "ginger hair" usually lands me a spot in front...obvious rookie. 

 I was so impressed with Sensei Kelly on my first visit because he talked about the importance of Aikido being about centering yourself on love while being firm and purposeful. Oh, and did I mention he's friends with Steven Seagal? He is an incredible teacher and even connected me with one of his students in Singapore who is from Atlanta, GA! He just exudes composure and patience but I also know he had me face to the mat in 3 seconds using only one hand on my elbow. Wax on, wax off. 

What a rookie. #can'tevenlookintimidating.

The biggest thing I have learned so far from Aikido is that you can't fight negative energy with negative energy, on the dojo (the practice area for Aikido) or in your life. People will always out power you in negativity or force but when you learn to neutralize that energy through directing its path, you exert minimal energy and you have protected yourself and the other person-even the haters. 

Just don't go ninja'ing nobody who don't need ninja'ing...

I'm SINGing: Mortal Kombat Theme Song